Wednesday, July 17, 2013

Confusing, Weird, Wonderful: NM, AZ, LV, SD

This morning I realized I've been dreaming much more vividly the past few weeks. My imagination is coming out of hibernation.
(Rewind Three/Four weeks) I'm in bed in New Mexico at the top of a mountain- the wind rustling against trees sounds like ocean waves. I don't want to hurry out tomorrow, but may have to for AZ is calling.
My great uncle Glenn is the coolest. He laughs with his whole body and is full of joy and pride for the life of achievement, accumulation, adventure, exploration he has led. This chapter of it takes place at the top of a mountain with a woman he loves. Talking with him reinforces the idea of independence and figuring out the way to live as an individual. We have no idea the consequence and beauty that will come out of the choices we make for ourselves, so FIDLAR?
Max- on the right, is one of my proudest additions to my social circle this summer. See you in SF brother.
The dust in the air in eastern Arizona makes the sky look like its on fire. We (Dan's friends that happily let me tag along) didn't spend too much time in Phoenix except having an amazing Mexican meal at Barrio Cafe.
It's so hot around Phoenix/Tempe that my AZ posse is eager to get out of town. The climate changes quickly- a two hour drive takes us from city to desert to pines and the temperature dropped to a managable 90 as we drove through the forrest.
First stop Grand Canyon. It's breathtaking. Go see it and howl into the air.
We spend the next two nights at the Firefly festival for yoga/music/spirituality. I don't quite fit in but am open minded enough to get along with the loving, peaceful people that feel at home here. It's easy to learn from people who are tapped into something where I've only scratched the surface.
On the way back to town we stop in Sedona. It's easier to listen to your own internal voice when you get outside of a city. We eat lunch by a creek and play and meditate. The water rushes through the red rocks and splashes around at our feet.
To my friends in AZ- you are special community and your openness is rewarded with gifts from the universe. Never change or let your hearts get too full that you can't accept more of the wonderful life that's heading your way.

Finally made it to Vegas...and had a time.
First day I get a heavy dose of perspective. After being bummed about losing a little money I see a kid backflip ALMOST into a pool and knock out his four front teeth: makes you think that money is silly to begin with and how lucky I am to have a little bit I can afford to part ways with. We arrive and leave the world without $, so for now the currency I'm more concerned with producing and receiving is love-I'll take smiles as well. By the end of this summer trip I'm going to be able to love so much more intensely than I have before (so watch out bitches.)

Guys I met at the 2p2 party or at the Rio live for poker. They are obsessed, super motivated, and committed to studying, testing ideas, and practicing as much as they are to playing. That's the way to make a living out of a game, but it's a little sad to see this many smart young people completely consumed by one thing. I'll probably never put in the time to reach my poker potential- it's not worth denying some other part of myself to create the time to do so.
Most poker players have massive egos. There's a blatant lack of self awareness that tends to trap people who have worked hard into thinking they are entitled to constant success.
Vegas is a playground. The side pieces (women watching their beaus play in the biggest games) are a bunch of supermodels. The 2p2 party is a nerdtastic good time.
Next time I'm in Vegas it will be different: more shows and fancy, romantic dinners and less poker.

I drive to sunny San Diego for a week of detoxing with the wonderful Anna Springer and Lauren Fitz.
The first few days of Pacific Beach are full of dog walks, beach cruising, and yoga. One class is themed "Rasheet Rivah" (or something like that) which is a sanskrit meditation for "I am changing, I am evolving."
Among many other things, the summer has been a reminder of how good it feels to make friends and meet people. Anna took a day off so we could go surfing. We drink bottomless mimosas and go to a Padres game. We sing the cup song and listen to her friends Joey and Alex play guitar then dance all day at the gay pride festival.

I drive to drop my car at LAX and head back to New Mexico with fam this time.
We eat massive steaks at the edge of Texas and see the world's biggest pistachio. We go to Roswell and have a picnic at the white sands.
One day I get dropped off at the side of the road miles from my uncle's with a bag of drinks and snacks and wander into the mountains to find my way back, alone. It is exhausting and at times disorienting. A pack of elk run by- they are massive and powerful. After a few hours of climbing mountains I find a path that leads me to a road that points me in the right direction. I'm back in time for dinner.
"The weakling who has refused the conflict, acquiring nothing, has had nothing to renounce. He alone who has striven and won can enrich the world by bestowing the fruits of his victorious experience."

And we're caught up to today- one more night in New Mexico then flying back to my car in Cali.
I'll leave you with a Rumi poem I saw in an art gallery "The moment I heard my first love song I began searching for you, not knowing how blind I was. Lovers don’t finally meet somewhere; they are in each other all along."

I miss you. Where are my snapchat replies?

1 comment:

  1. What is this snapchat? In other news, we miss you here. It's hot and humid and hopefully by the end of this week I'll have something really exciting to tell you. Hopefully.